FINDING MEANING by DAVID KESSLER

FINDING MEANING_Kessler_2019

Amazon Summary
Finding Meaning: The Sixth Stage of Grief
by David Kessler (Author)

David Kessler – the world’s foremost expert on grief and the coauthor with

Elisabeth Kübler-Ross of the iconic On Grief and Grieving – journeys beyond the classic five stages to discover a sixth stage: meaning.
David has spent decades teaching about end of life, trauma and grief. And yet his life was upended by the sudden death of his twenty-one-year-old son. How does the grief expert handle such a devastating loss?
In Finding Meaning, Kessler shares his hard-earned wisdom and offers a roadmap to remembering those who have died with more love than pain, how to move forward in a way that honours our loved ones and ultimately transform grief into a more peaceful and hopeful experience.
An inspiring must-read for anyone struggling to figure out how to live after loss.

Review
“We have a choice to rise or fall after tragedy. David Kessler knows this all too well, both as a trailblazing expert on grief and as a bereaved parent. If you want to find purpose and meaning in your life after loss, you can’t miss this book.” (Tony Robbins, #1 New York Times bestselling author)

“David Kessler writes of a world that is rarely examined with such sensitivity. Now he has gone to an even deeper and more soulful place. He is a healer par excellence to others who are in pain” (Marianne Williamson, Author of Return to Love)

MY THOUGHTS:

“ Potential for finding meaning is always there”.( Chapter 14)

This book addresses the wide range of coping with GRIEF.

Kessler presents the SIXTH dimension of grief as FINDING MEANING, in addition to the commonly accepted 5 stages, namely,
1.DENIAL
2.ANGER
3.BARGAINING
4.DEPRESSION and
5.ACCEPTANCE.

The salient points about FINDING MEANING are:

1. Meaning is relative and personal.
2. Meaning takes time. You may not find it until months or even years after loss.
3. Meaning does not require understanding.
4. Even when you find meaning, you won’t feel it was worth the cost of what you lost.
5. Your loss is n
ot a test, a lesson, something to handle , a gift or a blessing. Loss is simply what happens to you in life. MEANING is what you MAKE happen.
6. Only you can find your own meaning.
7. Meaningful connections will heal painful memories.

The broader MODEL outlined by Kessler for GRIEF is applicable to the living with a diagnosis of CANCER/CAREGIVING and in general coping with cancer.

The book is full of real life stories of people who have found/ made special meaning in their grief situation.
The presentation is very attractive and leads to compulsive reading.

Easy to read and learn.

I did not feel like stopping reading and learning how different persons have responded to their life’s challenges.
I learnt a lot from reading this book, about living with a diagnosis of cancer.

Some of the quote from the book:

Every person’s grief is unique as their fingerprint.

Potential for meaning is always there.

Trauma always has grief mixed in, but not all grief is traumatic.

Our worst moments can be seeds of our best moments. They have an amazing power to transform us.

We arrive in the middle of the movie and we leave in the middle of the movie.

Meaning is all around us. We just have to look to discover it.

All of us get broken in some way. What matters is how we get up and put the pieces back together again.

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